8th grade Poetry

I lie in bed wide awake,

With the most painful headache.

I can’t help but overthink.

My eyes are tired; I can’t even blink.

My thoughts are going around in circles.

I try to count every shade of my room’s purples.

I bite my nails,

What if everything fails?

I scratch at my brain,

And I watch the rain.

I can’t help but wonder,

Just for it all to be interrupted by thunder.

I long to find peace deep inside me,

Dreading to hear someone say I’m a failure.

I torture myself with my thoughts,

Pointing out to myself all of my negative spots.

I eat away at myself for not getting that “A,”

Trying to make myself feel okay.

But I feel the ocean of tears,

Forming because of my fears.

What if I’m not good enough?

What if I’m not smart enough?

What if I’m not perfect?

So, I admit I am an addict.

I am a little girl addicted to perfection.

If I fail, I show myself no affection.

So I stay up days and nights,

And I hate myself for having time to dream about the northern lights.

But I admit,

I cannot be the perfect student everyone sees fit.

I am not what everyone expects me to be.

I see in their eyes the disappointment towards me.

I convince myself that I have reached perfection,

And I feed it with constant validation.

Maybe this is bad for me,

But what if I just let it be?

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